Improving your scenes

When writing a book, I tend to get caught up in "the book." Which means the overall character arc and the overall plot line. I am a big picture person. When it comes to revisions, I must work hard to become a small item person. Some people are the opposite. They work each sentence, paragraph and scene then put together all the pieces to make a "big picture." Both ways accomplish the task. Both ways look at the structure of each scene. The question becomes, how do you know you are building your scene's right?

Let's begin with a review of basic scene structure. Each scene is in itself a short story and contains three parts. The first part is the statement of a goal which needs to be immediate and definite. The second part is to immediately introduce and develop conflict to the goal. Finally at the end of the scene there should be a failure to reach the goal or a tactical disaster. Keep in mind that this disaster could appear to be a success for the character, but in the long run turns out to be a real problem. If your scene does not have these three things, cut it.

What?! No~ I love that scene, you think. Okay, so cut it and paste it into a separate file. Now read the scene before and after. What, if any, information was lost? Did the scene actually advance the over all plot? Or was it filler? If you decide you absolutely need the scene, it's time to work on it as an individual story. Work in your cut and pasted file. Cut out any sentences that don't immediately and definitively state the goal. Then cut the sentences that don't immediately introduce or develop a conflict to that goal. Finally, end with your disaster. The disaster can be personal or it can be external.

Read the scene again and ask yourself, does it add to the overall character goal? Does it strengthen the overall character conflict? Finally does it make sense in the over all story line and will it keep the reader turning pages?

All the pieces must mesh together. Never write a disaster only because you need to have a disaster at the end of a scene. I had a friend once who had her character slip on her doorstep and fall in the bushes, dropping her groceries. She got up, picked up her groceries and went inside. When I asked the writer why she had the character slip, she said, "There needs to be action in the beginning of the scene. This is my action." But her action had nothing to do with the overall story or characterization. Her character was not a klutz. No one saw her fall. She did not leave an important can of beans out in the bushes that she later needed to retrieve. Retrieving the can of beans did not lead to seeing a murder, or her friend's lover cheating.

Beware the action or conflict for the sake of action or conflict. Every piece must fit together like a puzzle or you will lose your reader's interest and your story won't be told.

Are you a scene person or a big picture person? Does being a scene person slow you down? As a big picture person do you skip the revision step of reviewing each scene with a critical eye?

I'd love to hear what you think. Cheers~

Get the Hook

On the Vaudeville stage they used to bring out the hook when an act was bad and yank them from the stage. This was a great attention getter and made the audience react with hoots and hollers.

When writing, a hook is also an attention getter. You need to write something that catches the reader's attention and doesn't let them put the book down. Each chapter, each scene needs to have two hooks. One at the opening and one at the ending. Your job as a writer is to keep your reader up all night because they HAVE to know what happens next. It doesn't matter if you write short fiction (40-60,000 words) or long (90-100,000). In today's market there isn't time for long passages of description unless it has hook. Unless the reader has to know what is around the next corner or what Billybob is going to do when confronted with the truth.

A hook can be action. It can be emotion such as regret, or guilt or fear. It can be confrontation or impending doom. Look for the punch in your scene and start there. Here's an example: Evil preferred the cover of darkness. So it was no surprise when Detective Ryce Alden found himself behind crime scene tape at 3 a.m.
This example sets the tone of the book and invites the reader to wonder what happened and read on.

I'm judging a contest and am surprised by the lack of hook in the entries. It's not about word count, my friends, it's about hook. When working on a partial or contest entry, don't look at page count, don't think that the more words you can squeeze in the better--it isn't. An entry or partial can be short. The goal is to leave the reader/judge/editor/agent wanting to read more. If you can do that, you will be successful in all that you do.

Query Letters-Part III- writing the actual beast

Now that you know your market, you have your pitch and your back cover blurb, it's time to write the actual letter. Here's a format I've found successful.

Salutation: (Dear Ms. Smith) - always direct the letter to a person-not a publisher or agency this shows you have done your homework.

Opening: (It was so nice to me you at whatifacon. I've always had an interest in stories of space exploration. After meeting you I believe my story, Spacequest, a 90,000 word completed Scifi is something that might interest you and your readers.) or (I am a big fan of your blog. Your thoughts about trends in the market really got me thinking how my manuscript. I think Spacequest, a 90,000 word completed Scifi might be something that would interest you.) - always start with a complementary sentence- that shows you have done your homework- followed their blog, checked out their website to discover they have sold books by authors who are writing what you write, etc.

Hint: Be careful not to give them a reason to turn you down on your opener. Example: if you did meet them and spilled coffee on them- don't mention it! If you disagreed with a blog or opinion- don't mention it! Even trickier- if they say that westerns aren't selling- don't send them a western- not even if your buddy just sold three. Don't insult them by telling them you know their job better then they do. Instead go find someone looking for westerns. Also-if your word count is high or low for the market- don't mention the word count. Don't give them a reason to reject you.

Next- Present your tag line: (Following is the tag line for Spacequest: An intrepid space cadet must pass through the galaxy of death stars to save his planet.)

Then give them your back blurb: (A MAN ON A MISSION...Junior Samples knows the code that will allow him to control the monster computer that is guiding the deathstars to his planet. (BR 549...) He has only 24 hours to make it through the galaxy of deathstars and implant the code but his lack of computer skills stands in his way.
A COMPANION OUT FOR NUMBER ONE...Bill Gatesman knows how to implement the code but is only interested in dominating the universe. Saving the planet is low on his list.
Can a hillbilly convince the computer world's biggest genius to work together to save mankind? Or are we all lost?)

Give a small paragraph about your qualifications: (I have been a member of a local scifi writers group for two years. I've finaled in three whatifacon contests. Judges have found my work fast paced and funny.)

Hint: again be careful not to give them a reason to reject you- ensure that you have entered contests in your genre. Or that you've taken workshops, etc. Don't tell them your mother/sister/best friend loved the work.

Finally, close with an ending paragraph that shows your professionalism: (Enclosed please find the first eight pages and a short synopsis per your guidelines. I've added a small bio and an SASE (self addressed stamped envelope) for your reply. I look forward to hearing from you.

Sincerely, X

This is a simple template you can use to write your letter. Next week- we'll discuss what each piece of a proposal -query, synopsis, chapters- are for and how to ensure they create a branded marketing package. Cheers!